Mistress Snake makes a somewhat startling suggestion…
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Ch. 2.2
Mistress Snake gave him a look before saying scornfully, ‘If I don’t try every means possible to get his attention, am I supposed to wait helplessly until they pack me off to the Exchange to be sold to those loutish itinerant Guardians? Then again, a baby like you wouldn’t understand even if I explained it.’
Dandan snorted. Baby?? Ha! When I was out and about with my former owner killing everything in the four cardinal directions, you probably weren’t even born yet…
Resting her head on one hand, Mistress Snake frowned and sighed, ‘There’s been no lack of stunning beauties who have tried to sleep with him but all ended up being chased out. Come to think of it, he really seems immune to feminine charms… don’t tell me he bats for the other team?’ She said to the rabbit beside her, ‘It’s a pity that I won’t be able to enjoy myself with a high-class mortal like Second Master. Since you said that he prefers white fluffy types, why not try your luck?’
‘Try what?’
‘Get into bed with him, of course. Who knows, you might just get lucky and he’ll make a pact with you, making you an overnight success¹.’ With an air of ‘no need to feel too obliged to me’, Mistress Snake wriggled her waist slightly and then slithered away.
¹ 飛黃騰達 fēihuáng-téngdá. If you’re not reading this chapter at hiding in plain sight, it has been stolen and reproduced by novelscraping sites.
Gazing at the crimson tulle skirt covering the bright green snake skin, Dandan thought that the sight really was beyond description. He remained where he was for a while then said aloud, ‘You haven’t told me what I should do after getting into bed with him…’
A gust of cold wind was his answer.
Dandan shivered.
Should he do it?
It sounded… easy enough.
The Song Manor was extremely grand and labyrinthine in layout and, for some unknown reason, chock-full of gardens. After several turns here and there, Dandan was unsurprisingly lost. He stopped beside a cluster of roses in full bloom, looked up at the moon and sighed. Who would have thought that he, the one and only Supreme Jade Rabbit in existence across the Three Realms, would be reduced to such a sorry state?
Just then, Styx’s grey-haired figure was seen in a distant corner of the corridor. He seemed to be on an urgent errand judging by how quickly he was walking. This kind of haste likely meant that he had something urgent to report to his master so following him might actually help lead Dandan to Second Master.
Having made up his mind², Dandan followed behind stealthily. After traversing a few winding corridors, he found himself in a courtyard of unique design. Above the entrance hung a board inscribed with the words ‘Hengfeng House’.
Dandan padded silently over to the lit window where Styx’s tall, spare figure was shadowed.
² 打定主意 Dǎdìng zhǔyi. Translation belongs to theresanother(DOT)wordpress(DOT)com.
‘Second Master, there’s news from the beast colosseum.’
‘Oh? What’s the result?’ Song Lin’s distinctively throaty voice could be heard.
‘… The Snow Lotus leopard suffered a crushing defeat having been ripped to pieces and then swallowed by that evil spirit.’
Song Lin was silent for a moment before commenting, ‘I see.’ Faint disappointment flavoured his tone.
Styx said, ‘In recent years, the beast trappers have caught easily hundreds of spirit beasts both big and small, yet not a single one has survived the challenge of the beast colosseum. Any beast that can’t even make it past that stage is not good enough for the Guardians’ Tournament. We’ve tried basically all the beasts mentioned in the Southern records. Why not employ more beast trappers to capture a few unique beasts from the North?’
Song Lin gave a little wave and said, ‘I’ll leave it to you then.’
Styx nodded and withdrew from the room.
Dandan stayed hidden in the shadows, still pondering as he watched Styx’s back disappear from view.
That big Snow Lotus leopard died so fast? The beast colosseum seems like a really ghastly place… Judging from their conversation, it seems like surviving the beast colosseum is a prerequisite for becoming Second Master’s bonded spirit pet but what exactly is this beast colosseum? Why should I volunteer for such a thankless³ task? No thanks, forget it. For now, it’s probably best to shelf the plan to sleep with him.
Before he could make up his mind however, the window above him slid open with a brushing sound and a shadow fell abruptly over him…
Dandan’s heart was thumping loudly as he raised his head slowly only to see Song Lin, head resting on one hand, looking down his nose⁴ at him.
‘Well well, it’s the little powder puff.’
³ 吃力不討好 chīlì bù tǎohǎo. Please consider reading from theresanother(DOT)wordpress(DOT)com rather than from novelscraping sites.
Dam-nation…
Surely not…
Dandan gulped, flicked his long furry ears and said weakly, ‘Second Master… g-good evening… .’
‘What are you doing out here so late?’
‘I… came out to wee-wee…’
‘You came all the way to my place to wee-wee, most interesting.’
The bad feeling Dandan had intensified. Song Lin’s long arms scooped and carried him up straight into the room, holding him up so that he dangled in mid-air at eye level. For some reason, whenever this Song Lin levelled that icy blue gaze at him, there was always something so innately5 overwhelming about it that he couldn’t help feeling unnerved.
Dandan: Who can tell me why such a scary fellow likes fluffy things? It’s just not right!
His heart skipped a beat and he ventured, ‘Second Master, to be honest, I lost my way and didn’t manage to find a place to wee-wee…’
‘Uh huh.’ Song Lin emptied a vase of flowers, placing them on the table before positioning the rabbit over the mouth of the vase. ‘Come, I’ve found you a place. Do it here. Make sure to aim properly first.’
Dandan: ‘…!’ You really are… a pervert, for sure! You actually want to watch a rabbit peeing?
‘… Er, I don’t feel like it suddenly…’
Song Lin’s expression was mostly unreadable although he seemed to give a very brief chuckle. ‘Why not?’
‘… Your watching me… is making me nervous… I can’t do it…’
‘Ahh.’ With a quirk of an eyebrow, Song Lin turned his head away gracefully.
‘…’
Oi… I didn’t mean that you shouldn’t look… what I meant was let me go!!! Dandan was nearly frantic.
(Approx. 1034 words)
12’s notes:
⁴ 居高臨下 jūgāo-línxià: occupy a commanding position (or height); look down from
5 與生俱來 yǔshēngjùlái: 1. inherent 2. innate
1/3/2020: Edited paragraphs for clarity.
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Translated and edited by 12
hiding in plain sight 
I definitely didn’t expect Dandan was “killing everything in the four cardinal directions” (even if that’s an exaggeration). Also…does Dandan not know what sex is? The ending of this chapter simply makes me speechless.
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Haha! The undignified ending of this chapter still makes me chuckle (juvenile, but still…)
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